CALM AFTER THE STORM

Consider it a sheer gift, friends, when tests

and challenges come at you from all sides.

You know that under pressure, your faith-

life is forced into the open and shows its

true colors. So don't try to get out of any-

thing prematurely. Let it do its work so

you become mature and well-developed,

not deficient in any way.

(James 1:2-4, The Message)

A very timely verse in one of my devotionals this morning.

Despite reading/listening to Unoffendable by Brant Hansen multiple times and believing I had finally mastered the message, I had not.

The last couple of days I had been struggling with anger. No, it was more than that. It was rage triggered by two deceitful people who managed to push all my buttons I didn't think were left to push. And then as the intensity of feelings escalated beyond boiling point, I realized there was much more behind it than the incidents that had sparked it. It was like a dam had broken deep beneath the surface and my mind was being flooded by intense feelings that had been repressed for too long. Scary insight for someone who thought they no longer had any anger towards anyone, and had forgiven and let go of all wrongs from the past.

I prayed, but my prayers did not calm me, and I was unable to stay focused on the project I had been working on, so I turned to some mindless paperwork and something I could listen to while doing it. Maybe some praise and worship music.

The first thing that came up when I went to YouTube was this livestream of a service at First Baptist Atlanta. It started with praise and worship, but what finally managed to calm me was Dr. Anthony George's message--"Our Plans in God's Hands."

 

It came with words that felt were being spoken right to me--RELEASE THEM TO GOD!--near the end of the message, when Pastor George was talking about how we can't control people, circumstances, or Satan. 

He mentioned a book that had recently caught his eye, which he purchased and read, called "Let Them" by Mel Robbins (which I have just ordered from the library, and am number 257 in queue).  "Let them" referring to the fact that we can't control what other people do, or their attitudes or mindsets.  We need to release them to God, and let them sow their seeds and reap their crops.

I went to bed feeling great peace that night, but when I woke up the next morning, instead of my usual first thoughts of the day which tend to be, "Thank you, God, for the gift of this new day and for watching over me and protecting me while I slept," the very first thought was of one of the people who had enraged me the most, and the incident that provoked it. 

My remorse was profound, but God in His infinite mercy and grace, instead of rebuking me, reminded me of Matthew 5:44-45 and Romans 12:14, and laid it on my heart to pray for the person, which I did. 

At first it was really hard, because we were in a power struggle over an issue that I had the right to but he was defying, and there was no way I could force him to do what I wanted him to do. But as I kept praying and purposing to trust God and relinquish my need to be right and desire to be in control and have my own way, my heart softened towards him, I gradually began seeing things from a different perspective, and there was true calm when I finallly reached the place where I could no longer see why I had been so angry with him in the first place.

DON'T LOOK AT THE STORM

But when he saw the strong wind and

the waves, he was terrified and began

to sink. "Save me, Lord!" he shouted.

Jesus immediately reached out and

grabbed him. "You have so little faith,"

Jesus said. "Why did you doubt me?"

(Matthew 14:30-31)

Over the last several weeks I've been trying to live the life Brant Hansen writes about in his books Unoffendable, and Life is Hard. God is Good. Let's Dance. I've been trying to relax and stay focused on the present, trusting that God is sovereign and in control, and acknowledging that the future is His department--not mine.

It has been a much more relaxing way to live, but when things look particularly hopeless, it's been hard not to project and fall into old patterns of imposing limitations on myself and thinking I have to do this or I have to do that. Maybe I don't.

Thankfully, the Lord does not allow me to flounder for long. He has been so patient and longsufferng, sending me encouragement in unexpected ways when I need it the most. A verse in my Bible, a text from a friend, a blog post--even a license plate. Today it was through one of my devotionals that I opened up to a large, bold print heading--Don't Look At The Storm.

A BETTER WORD

Why am I discouraged? Why is my heart

so sad? I will put my hope in God! I will

praise him again--my Savior and my God!

Now I am deeply discouraged, but I will

remember you...  each day the LORD

pours his unfailing love upon me... Why

am I discouraged? Why is my heart so

sad? I will praise him again--my Savior

and my God! (Psalm 42:5-11, NLT)

The word I picked out for the new year was "Balance." 

My church begins each year with 21 days of prayer and fasting, and after a very stressful and overwhelming 2025, I was looking forward to kicking off 2026 with a peaceful time of prayer and devotions that would set the tone for the days to come. This is not, however, the way it played out.

Right from the get-go, I was bombarded by unexpected frustrations and disappointments at things that didn't turn out as I had hoped they would. Instead of peace and balance, I felt rattled and thrown off course. 

I wrote a post about it on my other blog (Thanking God for Being so Patient and Longsuffering), so no need to go into it again here, except to say that the Lord, in His infinite mercy and grace, used those days of stress and turmoil to reveal some better words for me to focus on such as patience, trust, and unoffendability, all of which can lead to the peace and balance I so desire. 

I love what Mary, from Visits With Mary shared on her blog about how she had been humming the old Frank Sinatra song, "I did it my way," when she heard the  Lord put the words in her heart, "You should've been doing it MY way--blessings would have been more abundant." 

God used those words to remind me that His ways are not my ways, nor His thoughts my thoughts (Isaiah 55:8). All the frustrations and fears that had rattled me were just tests. They would not have been able to affect me the way they did had I been resting in Him and trusting in His sovereign plan instead of focusing on my own expectations. 

"Don't project," I felt Him speaking to my heart, "I know the end from the beginning, and am in total control."

A FORGOTTEN PRAYER

As I sat down in my little prayer corner to do my daily devotions, I spotted a folded paper that had mysteriously appeared on top of my journal. Curious to know what it was, I unfolded it and found a three-page prayer a friend had e-mailed me for my birthday back in 2014 (almost 12 years ago).

How it got there I do not know, but the timing was perfect. More perfect than on the day she sent it to me so long ago. 

Among other things, it contained a link to a song sung by Israel Houghton.  It was a song that led hope to arise even though things were looking pretty bleak and hopeless in the natural.

 

My daily devotional offered further encouragement and confirmation of my friend's long forgotten prayer.

It started out with a question that described my feelings to a T: "Perhaps today you feel less than holy, worthy, or useful...but God can transform what is lowly to be of great use to Him, if only you are willing."  Followed by a reminder that despite my age, I am still a valuable work of God in progress, designed to become stronger in faith and in wisdom so I can become the blessing to others He intended me to be. 

I am willing, and as I stand on the cusp of this new year, I do so with faith and hope. I choose to let the old year rest, and look forward with great expectancy to what the Lord is about to do in 2026.