VISUAL OF A METAPHOR

I am the vine; you are the branches. If you 
remain in me and I in you, you will bear much
fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.
(John 15:5)


Several of my large house plants were in need of pruning and repotting. A friend came over to help me, and before I realized what she was doing. She had cut all the leaves off the dangling stems of the nephthytis plant and tossed the bare stalks aside.

When she saw my look of horror, she told me the leaves would root if I put them in water.

Our friendship being more important to me than the plants, I zipped my lips and did what she said. However, not before rescuing the discarded vines, planting them in a new pot, and putting them out on my balcony.


The vines sprouted new leaves and flourished. None of the leaves, however, grew roots--neither the ones in glasses of water, nor the ones I eventually planted in hopes they might root in the soil.

Though the leaves thrived for quite a while, some sooner, some later, all started to fade and die.

SEATED AT THE TABLE

And God raised us up with Christ and seated us
with him in the heavenly realms in Christ Jesus...
(Ephesians 2:6)

A friend recently posted a beautiful tribute to me on Facebook. It really touched my heart. For a few moments I felt valued, overwhelmed by warm, fuzzy feelings that made me all teary, and that lasted about as long as it took to re-read the post and zero in on the words about me being a connector. That's when my mind started meandering down a slippery slope of stinking thinking into a gallery where memories of painful slights, friends I had connected who preferred each other's company to mine and stopped calling or including me in their get-togethers, lined the walls. Fortunately, I had an antidote that quickly redirected my thoughts and cut my visit short, an antidote found in Heather Holleman's devotion on Ephesians 2:6.

In her devotion, Heather shares her struggles to earn a seat at the "table" she thought would bring her happiness, and how that caused her to live in a state of comparison and envy until the day the word seated in that passage of Scripture jumped out at her, making her realize we're already seated with Christ at His banquet table.  This truth transformed her life--and mine too. If you've ever experienced a similar struggle, I hope it will bring healing to yours as well.

No one needs to stand on the outside whistfully looking in. There is a special seat reserved for each one of us around Christ's table, the very best table, and all seats provide equal access to Him who loved us so much that He suffered and died on the cross so we could be forgiven of our sins and have eternal life.

WHEN GOD'S PLAN IS A DIFFERENT PLAN

Many are the plans in a person's heart, 
but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails.
(Proverbs 29:19)

As I lie on an echocardiography table listening to blood slosh through valves, the enormity of what I've been through overwhelms me. My plan had always been to choose hospice over treatment should any major disease overtake me, but God had another plan.

My life flashes before my eyes, and I ponder how differently it turned out than I ever expected or imagined.

I remember the dreams, when I was young, of falling in love with someone I would grow old with, of having a close-knit family that enjoyed doing things together. I did fall in love, get married, and have a family, but my husband and I did not grow old together, and the many mistakes I made as a single mom could have killed any chance for the strong bonds I yearned for, had God not had a better plan.

In the years that followed, so many poor choices, so many squandered opportunities, but so great evidence of God’s mercy as well.

I think of friends I went to school with who appear to have lived successful, meaningul lives, and quickly remind myself that comparison is never a good thing. We are all Divine originals, one of a kind creations--not copies or imitations. The very things I feel most remorseful about are the things that led me to Jesus. I wonder if I ever would have felt a need for His saving grace had I pursued my talents and education to their fullest, or if, instead, I would have spent my life chasing after the things this world has to offer, instead of the things that have eternal value? 

Despite my age, I am still a work in progress, grateful that God does not measure success in numbers. I know that I am exactly what and where I need to be for this particular moment in His plan. From His perspective, my life is not the tragic waste I so often think it to be.  If I reach that one person He intended for me to reach, bring hope to that one discouraged heart, or lead that one soul out of darkness to the foot of the Cross, then my purpose will have been accomplished, and my life not lived in vain.

HE KNOWS, HE LOVES, HE CARES

He knows, He loves, He cares,
nothing this truth can dim,
He gives His very best to those
who leave the choice with Him.
(Source Unknown)

 Yesterday would have been the 12th Anniversary of my first ever blog--Random Thoughts of a Great-Granny Grandma. Though I never actually deleted it, it has become defunct. God, however, has an uncanny way of resurrecting what seems dead at a time when you least expect Him to, and His timing is always perfect.

This post is a repost of something I wrote shortly after venturing into Blogland. It would have remained forgotten, except for a comment that showed up in my e-mail this morning.

You see, one of the things that can still push my buttons, is not being acknowledged, and for some time now I have been praying for the Lord to heal me of this need, and just put whatever I write into the right hands at the right time. Today, He responded to that prayer by giving me a tiny glimpse into the unseen to reassure me that He is in control, and doing just that.

"Instead of going to Book Club today, I decided to stay home and write a Dear God letter about the ever growing mountain of frustrations I have been battling these last few weeks. Computer glitches that hold me up and keep me from doing what I want/need to do, friends who don't answer e-mails even when a response is repeatedly requested, legalism that doesn't allow for special circumstances, and on and on.

It all came to a head yesterday when I received an announcement from one of my job managers that we were getting yet another pay cut. Thanks to outsourcing, the choice has become work for less, or not at all. And the solution for keeping up with the growing cost of living? Work more hours and be grateful that there is still work out there to do. Kind of like the Israelites being told they had to continue making the same amount of bricks, but now they also had to collect their own straw (Exodus 5:6). Well, maybe that's a stretch, but it definitely described my frame of mind as I decided to take it to the Lord.

As I furiously scribbled, a couple of Scriptures came to mind. Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men (Colossians 3:23); Promotion comes neither from the east, nor from the west, nor from the south. But God is the Judge: He puts down one, and exalts another (Psalm 75:6-7 ); Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight (Proverbs 3:5-6).

Now I started feeling a little sheepish, and even more so when I felt that still, small voice in my heart gently questioning me: Have I not always taken care of you? Was there ever a need that went unmet? Have I not proved myself to you over and over?

Memories started popping up of my circusmatnces 11 years ago when I found myself uprooted and transplanted into an unfamiliar town, and how different things are in my life today. I remembered the days of overwhelming debt, the days of looking for change in the parking lot so I could go grocery shopping, the days of calling in sick to work because I didn't have money to put gas in the car. And I also remembered how the Lord provided in miraculous ways--not only for my needs, but for some wants as well. A crumpled $20 bill by the door of the supermarket; bags full of very gently worn designer clothes from a boss/friend who was constantly buying more and thrilled to find someone who would take the old ones out of her closet to make room for the new; a brand new car when the old one died.

Not that I would necessarily want to relive those days, but they were days when the Lord was able to reveal Himself to me in awesome ways. They were days when I learned to trust Him more than ever as I experienced first hand the manifestations of His faithfulness and love.

Today I am completely debt free, working in the comfort of my home at two jobs I really enjoy. Those are things I would never have dreamed of years ago when I first landed in this neck of the woods. And the Lord still continues to surprise me with little unexpected gifts from time to time. Like the check I recently received in the mail in an envelope with no return address. The name and address on the check were Paraclete, Philippians 4:19 (which for those of you not familiar with the Scriptures, is the address of a verse that reads And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus); the check number was not a number, but the sign of the fish; under the amount to be paid was a single line in bold print--With God All Things Are Possible; and the check was signed Paraclete. I still haven't figured that one out.

With each memory,the praises and thanksgiving flowed, and before I knew it, all the frustration had melted away, replaced by overwhelming peace and joy. Nothing had changed really, and yet everything had."

P.S. The picture comes from a post on my photo blog that reminds me to never say never.

TENTH ANNIVERSARY

The dark threads are as needful
In the weaver's skillful hand
As the threads of gold and silver
For the pattern He has planned.
(Corrie ten Boom)

 Today is this blog's tenth anniversary. I started out with lofty goals in mind, but allowed myself to be derailed by the sudden and unexpected. As a result, I was MIA for a whole year, and it took the following quote scribbled on a crumpled piece of paper to get me back on track.

"Dear  friend, God may send you some valuable gifts wrapped in unattractive paper. But do not worry about the wrappings, for you can be sure that inside He has hidden treasures of love, kindness, and wisdom. If we simply take what He sends and trust Him for the blessings inside, we will learn the meaning of the secrets of His providence, even in times of darkness." (A. B. Simpson)

To me, New Year's Eve 2018 was definitely a gift wrapped in unattractive paper. While others celebrated with toasts and fireworks, I lay in a Cardiac Intensive Care unit, intubated, hooked up to a ventilator, heavily sedated with Propofol and Fentanyl, and suffering from acute congestive heart failure, as well as double pneumonia. Yet, in retrospect, it truly did turn out to be a valuable gift filled with hidden treasures.

While still in the hospital, I felt inspired to write OIL OF MYRRH, a testimony to God's goodness, and the way He worked in my life during what started out as a very dark time. If you would like to read it, you can click on this link for a free download. I pray that it would bless and encourage you.

At the foot of the cross there is mercy and grace. There is forgiveness, healing, and deliverance. This is the place where the slate gets wiped clean and you can have a fresh start. All you have to do is believe it, and receive it.

A SACRIFICE OF TIME

Dear children, let's not merely say
that we love each other; let us show
the truth by our actions.
(1 John 3:18 NLT)

During prayer group this morning, our leader uttered a word she thought might be a message for one of us--sacrifice. No one responded. It definitely didn't feel as though it applied to me. Much later, though, while sitting in my car waiting for the light to change, a memory surfaced from long ago.

I was a camp counselor, and had befriended a special needs girl who worked in the kitchen. One evening she asked me if I would go fishing with her, and I used curfew as an excuse because I didn't want to go. Her response haunts me more today than it did back then. "Everybody is very nice," she said, "but when you need someone to do something with, there's nobody there."

I've always been selfish with my time, and have many regrets about how much of it has been squandered on things that have no lasting value. Sadly, I cannot undo the past, but I can change my priorities going forward. That word, sacrifice, may well have been a message for me after all.